Reading what you both said I don't think I have really accepted the way I am now. Which of course I need to do. I need to learn how to order things from grocery store that I can just drive up there and pick up. I keep thinking that they will bring out things that are out of date or I don't like the looks of it etc. I need to get over that mind set. My sense of trust in others has been severely damaged over the years so it is difficult for me.

I wish I had a woman that I could tell what to do and I would be more that happy to pay her well. I had to keep telling myself earlier when my stomach and back were hurting and I was sitting down with 2 heating pads going that it was alright for me to just sit there. I didn't need to get up and do something.