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    Passport Letter Archived Message

    Posted by Sleuth on June 17, 2016, 12:53 am

    ACTUAL PASSPORT LETTER-----HILARIOUS!

    This letter is a thing of beauty

    (even if the language is a bit rough)...

    You definitely feel the guy's pain!

    An actual letter to the passport office...



    Dear sirs,

    I'm in the process of renewing my passport, and still cannot believe

    this. How is it that Radio Shack has my address and telephone number and

    knows that I bought a cable t.v. from them back in 1987, and yet, the

    Federal Government is still asking me where I was born and on what date.

    For Christ sakes, do you guys do this by hand? My birth date you

    have on my social security card, and it is on all the income tax forms I've

    filed for the past 30 years. It is on my health insurance card, my driver's

    license, on the last eight damn passports I've had, on all those stupid

    customs declaration forms I've had to fill out before being allowed off the

    plane over the last 30 years, and all those insufferable census forms that

    are done at election times.

    Would somebody please take note, once and for all, that my mother's

    name is Maryanne, my father's name is Robert and I'd be absolutely astounded

    if that ever changed between now and when I die!!!

    I apologize, I'm really pissed off this morning. Between you an' me,

    I've had enough of this bullshit! You send the application to my house,

    then you ask me for my *****address.

    What is going on? You have a gang of Neanderthal assholes workin'

    there! Look at my damn picture. Do I look like Bin Laden? I don't want to

    dig up Yasser Arafat, for shit sakes. I just want to go and park my ass on

    a sandy beach.

    And would someone please tell me, why would you give a shit whether

    I plan on visiting a farm in the next 15 days? If I ever got the urge to do

    something weird to a chicken or a goat, believe you me, I'd sure as hell not

    want to tell anyone!

    Well, I have to go now, 'cause I have to go to the other end of the

    city and get another ******copy of my birth certificate, to the tune of $60.

    Would it be so complicated to have all the services in the same spot to

    assist in the issuance of a new passport the same day?? Nooooo, that'd be

    to damn easy and maybe makes sense. You'd rather have us running all over

    the ******* place like chickens with our heads cut off, then find some

    asshole to confirm that it's really me on the damn picture - you know,the

    one where we're not allowed to smile?! (bureaucratic ******* morons) Hey,

    you know why we can't smile? We're totally pissed off!

    Signed

    - An Irate Citizen.

    P.S. Remember what I said above about the picture and getting

    someone to confirm that it's me? Well, my family has been in this country

    since 1776 ........ I have served in the military for something over 30

    years and have had security clearances up the yingyang ........ However, I

    have to get someone'important' to verify who I am - you know, someone like

    my doctor WHO WAS BORN AND RAISED IN INDIA.!

    Sincerely,

    You Sure In The Hell Should Know Who.


    Message Thread:

    • Passport Letter - Sleuth June 17, 2016, 12:53 am