I found this little checklist today, a check list about what WikiHow finds to be a classy person.
It is something I try to be in my own life, and as I look at the 16 points, I am lacking in many of those points. Being classy is hard work, and in some cases, I don't have what it takes to measure up, or I have fallen lazy and lacking in energy to go that extra mile to be a truly classy person.
It's a daily endeavor that requires struggle to step away from my needs and desires and to become 'other-centered'.
It is no mistake that these classy people are often found at the upper echelons of society. Now not all of those people are classy, I assure you that. There are true assclowns with mega bucks schmoozing their way to the next buck, but there are people who never forgot from where they came and they treat the poorest or most awkward person in the room as if they were an honored guest.
I try to keep a list of classy role models, and try to treat people as they treated people. I look at people like Stan Musial, Jack Buck, Bill Cosby, and people like those. They were not rabble-rousers per se, but their classiness depended on their actions more than anything else. Jack Buck had a golden throat, but treated his profession with class and always knew that when he was talking, he could reach out to a prisoner or a lonely old person.
I use him as an example because that's what classy people do - they command respect because they take their time to value people and go the extra mile beyond the demands of their profession.
Granite City has been the home of countless classy people. Some like Peter Maer or some of the well-known doctors and bankers of old who gave to local causes were well-known. Other class acts live next to us and without drawing attention to themselves are ready to help a person in need, or give their efforts to their family, their church, and other institutions that serve.
I am enamored when I see a true lady at a cocktail party, who confidently works the room, then the following week, she's reading to children, or is visiting homebound patients either bringing meals or providing services for free.
Or maybe it's a business leader who takes some of his weekends and enjoins his family in doing chores for those who cannot help themselves.
It is the people who write thank you notes, and when you get it - want to treasure it.
Sadly, I do not match to the 16 points of being a class act. There are ways that I fall short.
To say precisely how I fall short is a point for my own personal reflection and action.
However, this link is really good.
I do wish that a lot of these points were instilled in our young people. Yet, as I say that, I honor the young people who already display these characteristics.
When I am around young people, I am surprised the good that is already present, and often overlooked.
That's the best way to be classy - to learn it as a habit.
I know I learned different points from both my mom and dad, and I honor them for being role models in their different ways.
Still, my lacking of classiness is nobody's fault but mine at this point of life. The points that don't come natural always have to be worked at. It should hurt, be tiresome..because being classy is a tiresome endeavor. Some people are high energy and detail oriented and make it all look so natural.
Some people are laid back and casual and you would never guess how much they do behind the scenes.
I also believe that one does not need a lot of money to be classy. This is one thing that irritates me about some people I know all too well.
They are good people that don't have money to pay their needs. Their house is an attrocity, yet they have some of the newest high tech devices.
I think to myself - yes, money is lacking, but a gallon of bleach costs a bit over a dollar or two for the discount stuff. Some ammonia, or off-brand pine cleaner can be had for around a buck.
But then there are people with much means who are not classy people either.
I'm just saying that some people feel that since they don't have the means, that they don't feel like they can act with class, or maybe they are down about where they are in life and stop caring a little bit and start letting things go.
I believe in meeting people where they are and while I cannot help the natural feeling of irritation, I want to stop at the feeling level and not take it to the judging level.
I think of people of World War II generation as a generation of people with class. There's something about the men and women of that age group that makes me lament that there are few people left as classy as they.
I think of the humble people who came home from the war and just quietly went to work, supporting their families.
When a WWII vet, or a person who grew up in that era starts talking, I start listening.
Some of these people were tradesmen and even some unskilled laborers. But that was no matter, as poor as some families were, they made sure the house was immaculate and that the children were neatly groomed before going into public. They may don working boots six days a week, but on the seventh, they're as neat as any business person.
Those days seem to be behind us.
Being classy is not all about style, but how one conducts oneself and holds themselves up is a major part of all of this. It just seems like the number of classy people that I know is dwindling.
I cannot rightly call myself a classy person, and in some respects, I am probably too young to have these 16 points refined. Usually people that are classy have spent years at doing it, and to get the respect as a person of class - one has to be a classy person for a long time.
I think most people have Some class to some degree. Class is something that is free of charge, and people who have little to no means are still able to have it and work at it.
It's a state of being, a mindset...it may direct what people with means do with their means. It may direct those with little to no means on how they treat themselves and conduct themselves.
So while people who don't try irritate me. I don't judge them - I said that already. But here's what is worse than irritating -- When people look at me as a snob for trying to be classy or look at me as less than masculine for not being beligerant, forceful, or for trying to keep the peace.
Also, my good deeds are not for discussion, but I don't like it when another person sees me doing something and then asks "Why are you doing that?" or accusing me of being a 'do gooder'.
It's true that even classy people cannot solve all the problems of the world and cannot help everyone. Still I just get angry when I try to show class, and then people still try to shoot it down.
I try to attend to those 16 points as much as I can. I don't want recognition - and maybe I do want to be respected, but the self-giving part of being classy is from the heart not for the vanity mirror.
So what do you think about the Points of classiness. Who is your model of a class act?
I have many more than whom I listed, and a lot of private figures as well.
on January 10, 2011, 11:41 am