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Re: re; different feelings
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Oh, yes. Fear is probably the very first thing we experience. Fear that we weren't ready to face our own mortality (which, of course, we already know about) Anger, for sure. Why me? Loneliness. I hated talking to to others - family, friends - about it. I didn't want them to be afraid. BIG mistake, by the way, BIG mistake. Sadness or feeling sorry for myself. These feelings came and went the first year. At some point, I did truly feel like I was going to be OK. Every time I began to feel those negative feelings, I'd jump up and do something, or whatever it took to move to the positive. I truly believe that negative feelings influence healing and outcome.
I prayed more during that first year than I had in years. I never had a fear of dying. I'd already researched and spoken to my surgeon and oncologist about statistics and knew my outcome had a high probability of survival. I think that's when I began to not worry as much.
There's no right or wrong way to go through this. Everyone says fear and worry are not productive and don't change anything. It's really hard not to worry or be fearful. If you feel you are dwelling on this too much, please find a support group. They can really help.
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