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My brother in law (knows nothing about football), just asked me the other day whether I knew the footballer, Liam Delap.

He used to teach him, apparently.

He reckons that Delap was the biggest twat he's ever encountered in his 25 years of teaching in state schools, and couldn't wait to see the back of him.

Face it, he's got 'Everton on loan' written all over him now.