Good to read your post. It was interesting to read as I am in a similar situation to you in that I feel I am 'getting there' with overcoming this and can handle situations with more confidence whereas previously I'd have seen one person using a urinal and headed straight for a cubicle - I've started putting myself in increasingly difficult positions and this time of year is a good time to test yourself as public places are really busy. The one thing I'm learning is not to panic and that there is never any rush - sometimes in really busy situations I can panic and try and force myself to go immediately as in my mind that is what I imagine other people are expecting me to do, which is utter nonsense obviously as firstly nobody cares, but also is the worst thing you can do as it just leads to locking up. I'm also similar to you in that I also currently try and avoid going at the same time as friends, I always have done ever since school days, which is a bit of a pain cos it means you're often looking over your shoulder trying to slip off without anyone tagging along going 'yeah I need to go too'. All entirely irrational but it's something I'm making steps to rectify in the new year, you can't reverse 15-20 years of avoidant behaviour overnight after all.
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