This messageboard is for Adults 18 years and over.
If you are under this age please leave the board.

Luton Outlaws accepts no responsibility for the content of this messageboard nor any other content posted on it.

Luton Outlaws disclaims all liability for such content to the fullest extent permitted by law.

What you read on here is 100% conjecture, fiction, lies, bullshit and complete bollocks. If you want to be taken seriously, you are in the wrong place.

Any potentially libellous comments that might jeopardise the future of this messageboard will therefore be deleted, and the person posting them will receive a ban.Enjoy.

    The GJ Building Company

    Posted by Beechpathisclosed on 14/1/2020, 8:36:13

    Mr Happy Clapper arrives at his house after a hard day at the office. Several builders vans are parked haphazardly around the property. Up on the scaffolding a workman is removing and dropping redundant tiles into the outstretched hands of his large Eastern European colleague who is unsuccessfully trying to catch them. Two more stand by, the taller just an onlooker while the other attempts to head some of them into a skip.
    A burly, shaven headed Liverpudlian with Assistant Site Manager emblazoned across his Hi-vis jacket is chewing gum whilst relaxing against a wall.
    “ Alright our kid. Looook affter yer caarr?”
    Mr HC sidesteps him and enters his front door.
    “ Hi honey, I’m home”
    I’ll give you home. Have you seen what they’ve done to our extension yet? They’ve got those 2 kids back to fix the roof and it’s still leaking like a sieve. Why couldn’t you have got a proper company in like the other houses in the street and done it properly?
    “ I keep telling you love, they’ve got a bigger budget than us. This lot were cheap”
    “So you keep saying. Where did you get this bloke from? After that last little shifty one left us in the lurch he took 6 months just scratching his head and looking at the job and then he turned up with this lot”
    “ He came highly recommended. I had to headhunt him. He was second in command at several large companies. He’s worked abroad. Terrific references!”
    “ Did you not actually interview him?”
    “ Of course I did. To be honest I did nod off at times though. He has that effect on you, particularly when he got his pi charts out. But that other one did the same before he started showing me his tattoos and singing hymns”
    “ He doesn’t seem to know what he’s doing. He’s got plasterers laying bricks and brickies fitting the bathroom. Once that subby from London went off sick it’s been a fiasco. And that Assistant Site Manager, the one who looks like a bouncer. What does he actually do?
    “ Well he is a bouncer actually. Not sure really, I think it’s something to do with morale. And he cleans the MD’s car. They’re a proper outfit though. They’ve got 19 back up staff in the site hut. One of them’s a psychologist. Ask them if you can have a look at their spreadsheets sometime, very impressive.”
    “ You need a bloody psychologist for keeping them on. What would it take for you to get rid, the whole lot to collapse?
    “ Give it time love. I’m sure it’ll turn out ok. And if it doesn’t I’ll just get big Mick back out of retirement to do the snagging again!”

      Re: The GJ Building Company

      Posted by Grumio on 14/1/2020, 18:30:58, in reply to "The GJ Building Company"

      What a load of shit.

        Re: The GJ Building Company

        Posted by Surrey Hatter on 14/1/2020, 14:26:09, in reply to "The GJ Building Company"

        Nice ironical piece. Thanks for making me smile.

          Re: The GJ Building Company

          Posted by Upset Hatter on 14/1/2020, 11:33:28, in reply to "The GJ Building Company"

          This is a DISCRACE

          And will be immediately reported to Gary Sweets whatsapp group!

            Re: The GJ Building Company

            Posted by crumpsall on 14/1/2020, 11:36:03, in reply to "Re: The GJ Building Company"

            That's a lot funnier than the original post!

            Re: The GJ Building Company

            Posted by Zoe on 14/1/2020, 11:07:47, in reply to "The GJ Building Company"

            The fact that you actually had enough time to come up with and then type out this load of old wank proves what a waste of oxygen you are.

            Off you pop

              Re: The GJ Building Company

              Posted by Wiener on 14/1/2020, 9:48:03, in reply to "The GJ Building Company"

                Re: The GJ Building Company

                Posted by KS on 14/1/2020, 9:31:45, in reply to "The GJ Building Company"

                Have you heard of the Infinite Monkey theory. It's the idea that given enough time you can get one or an infinite number of them to bash about on a typewriter and come up with a work of shakespeare. However the chance of it happening during a period of time hundreds of thousands of orders of magnitude longer than the age of the universe is extremely low - but technically not zero.

                I couldnt find anything in theory about the chances of coming up with that pile of shit though.

                  Re: The GJ Building Company

                  Posted by truth hurts on 14/1/2020, 16:18:46, in reply to "Re: The GJ Building Company"

                  Have you heard of the Infinite Monkey theory.

                  THE TABLOID PRESS!

                  Re: The GJ Building Company

                  Posted by Thatcham on 14/1/2020, 9:19:57, in reply to "The GJ Building Company"

                  Pathetic. Get a life

                    Re: The GJ Building Company

                    Posted by Andy Cappucino on 14/1/2020, 9:13:49, in reply to "The GJ Building Company"

                    Which one is supposed to be Boris Johnson then, the site manager?

                      Re: The GJ Building Company

                      Posted by Willington wally on 14/1/2020, 9:04:29, in reply to "The GJ Building Company"

                      Well I thought it was very amusing

                        Re: The GJ Building Company

                        Posted by To state the obvious on 14/1/2020, 9:08:23, in reply to "Re: The GJ Building Company"

                        That's why you're a wally. It's a shite attempt at humour.

                        Re: The GJ Building Company

                        Posted by bbb on 14/1/2020, 9:03:50, in reply to "The GJ Building Company"

                        garbage

                          Re: The GJ Building Company

                          Posted by bbb on 14/1/2020, 10:23:07, in reply to "Re: The GJ Building Company"

                          You are weird. Very weird.

                          Re: The GJ Building Company

                          Posted by Ches Fordroad on 14/1/2020, 9:02:55, in reply to "The GJ Building Company"

                          Who knew that the Mrs Brown's Boys scriptwriter was a Luton Outlaws poster?

                          Re: The GJ Building Company

                          Posted by RADSB on 14/1/2020, 9:01:38, in reply to "The GJ Building Company"

                          Mr Nappy Crapper writes shite - the end.

                            Re: The GJ Building Company

                            Posted by crumpsall on 14/1/2020, 8:53:34, in reply to "The GJ Building Company"

                            Cringe. That is absoulutely pathetic.

                              Re: The GJ Building Company

                              Posted by Garstang Hatter on 14/1/2020, 9:43:37, in reply to "Re: The GJ Building Company"

                              +1

                              Says far more about the person posting than it does about anyone else.

                              Re: The GJ Building Company

                              Posted by CP Hat on 14/1/2020, 8:46:44, in reply to "The GJ Building Company"

                              The worst attempt at humour I've ever read. Can't believe I wasted my small amount of time but to think you wasted a lot more...

                                Re: The GJ Building Company

                                Posted by Oh dear on 14/1/2020, 8:45:09, in reply to "The GJ Building Company"

                                A lot of effort for a load of shite.

                                Grow up.

                                  Re: The GJ Building Company

                                  Posted by Don't Lie on 14/1/2020, 9:01:13, in reply to "Re: The GJ Building Company"

                                  Had stopped reading by the third line and skipped straight to the replies to tell me all I needed to know.

                                    Re: The GJ Building Company

                                    Posted by Nearly a Genius on 14/1/2020, 9:42:27, in reply to "Re: The GJ Building Company"

                                    You did well.

                                      Re: The GJ Building Company

                                      Posted by Trigger on 14/1/2020, 10:50:16, in reply to "Re: The GJ Building Company"

                                      Good Grief, that is lamentable.

                                        Re: The GJ Building Company

                                        Posted by Suffolk Punch on 14/1/2020, 11:27:00, in reply to "Re: The GJ Building Company"

                                        To be fair, I've read a lot worse on here.

                                        I have no problem with someone trying to make us laugh. Maybe some of you who are so ready to criticise should give it a try.

                                          Re: The GJ Building Company

                                          Posted by Ches Fordroad on 14/1/2020, 12:03:58, in reply to "Re: The GJ Building Company"

                                          I suppose if you're the sort of person that finds Mrs Brown's Boys funny it would have you in tears, personally I found it about as funny as an episode of Mrs Brown's Boys.

                                            Re: The GJ Building Company

                                            Posted by Suffolk Punch on 14/1/2020, 12:57:16, in reply to "Re: The GJ Building Company"

                                            Not saying it's very funny, but happy to acknowledge that someone has tried to alleviate the negative mood on here at present.

                                            Of course, it's always easier to run with the pack and criticise.

                                              Re: The GJ Building Company

                                              Posted by crumpsall on 14/1/2020, 13:02:07, in reply to "Re: The GJ Building Company"

                                              'Run with the pack and criticise'?

                                              Come on SP, the pack are the ones who are criticising this time, surely people who find efforts like this one cringeworthy are entitled to point it out to that very pack?

                                            Re: The GJ Building Company

                                            Posted by crumpsall on 14/1/2020, 11:31:40, in reply to "Re: The GJ Building Company"

                                            It's not in the slightest bit funny seems to be the general opinion. I think it's crap, not clever, not amusing.

                                            Some people also find 'trevore' amusing. I don't, personally. People have reacted as they wish to, not how they 'ought to'.

                                              Re: The GJ Building Company

                                              Posted by Suffolk Punch on 14/1/2020, 11:37:05, in reply to "Re: The GJ Building Company"

                                              Hmmmm, not so sure about that, Crumps. Maybe homer could do a poll.

                                                Re: The GJ Building Company

                                                Posted by crumpsall on 14/1/2020, 11:39:50, in reply to "Re: The GJ Building Company"

                                                Let's see, when he gets up. Mid-afternoon I guess.

                                                I did find Upset Hatter's response quite funny, very 'Outlaws'!

                                                  Re: The GJ Building Company

                                                  Posted by Captain Mainwaring on 15/1/2020, 1:22:30, in reply to "Re: The GJ Building Company"

                                                  Post of the Year.

                                                  The ostriches are back and the sand is deeper!

                                [ Luton Outlaws - The Avenue of Evil ]

                                DISCLAIMER

                                The posts made on this board are the opinions of the people posting them and do not always reflect the opinion of the board administration.

                                Luton Outlaws is a totally independent forum, paid for and run by supporters of Luton Town and is not associated with Luton Town Football Club, lutontown.co.uk, lutonfc.com, Loyal Luton Supporters Club, Trust in Luton, Luton Town Supporters Club or anyone else for that matter and is declared a 100% Tombola Free Zone.

                                  Luton Outlaws accepts no responsibility for the content of this messageboard nor any other content posted on it. Luton Outlaws disclaims all liability for such content to the fullest extent permitted by law.

                                  What you read on here is 100% conjecture, fiction, lies, bullshit and complete bollocks. If you want to be taken seriously, you are in the wrong place. Enjoy. Admin contact - dilligaf.outlaws@gmail.com.

                                eXTReMe Tracker