Went through 7 years of looking after my mum through Alzheimer's disease, tried loads of things,some worked some didn't.
Regarding the wandering,I read that a black doormat would represent a hole or barrier which some wouldn't cross, actually worked a treat with mum.
A more off the wall one was,Mum kept on fucking about with the central heating boiler to the point I thought she was going to blow herself up, I had read an article about cafés/ canteen's where the expectation was you'd bring back your tray/ dishes to the counter,read that signage didn't work until a pair of eyes were included,the percentage of returns went up, further to that when the image of eyes had long lashes added,thus feminising them,they became less "threatening" and the returns went up further!
So,long winded I know,but I had tried putting signs up asking mum not to open the central heating cupboard to no avail, tried adding an image of feminised eyes,worked a treat.
Dementia is a terrible illness and any little things that help manage it can take certain worries away.
Best wishes to you,live in the day and enjoy the bright moments when they arise.

Its a grim disease. My mum would be fine sometimes then other times get in these mad panics because she wouldn't know where she was (or who my Dad was). It was a blessing when other health issues took her.

On the other hand my wife was out with a friend the other week whose dad has dementia and he's regressed back to the 80s when he was a top ad executive living his best life. He's in a nursing home but thinks he's eating all his meals at some top soho restaurant and that all the shit works of art on the walls are damien hirsts or somethings. He's literally having a fantastic time she says.

It is the worst - especially when the person in question (like my Mum) refuses to believe that they have dementia at all?

The only crumb of comfort we had in Mum's case is that she never got to the point when she didn't know who we were any more, but other than that it was so hard to maintain a normal relationship (she refused to eat, which ultimately led to her passing).

Feel for you mate - it's devastating for everyone involved...

very well put.

my dad - or whats left of him is in a nursing home in huyton. they are looking after him very well.

but any semblance of it being my dad is long gone - its an unrecognisable (painfully thin) old man who cant hardly open his eyes.

my 10 year old keeps asking to go and see him one last time, but i cant let him see my dad like this.

💙

Never apologise for a post like this mate 💙

I'm in the same boat as you lid and I feel for you. It's the most horrible of illnesses.
My Ma went about 3 years ago and it happened really quick. She's a shell of an old lady now, who looks a bit like my Ma.
It gets harder every time I see her.

It’s horrific. You go through so many different stages of bereavement.
We were lucky with my mum in that although so much of her was lost her personality didn’t change and to the day she died she was the sweetest, kindest, gentlest person you could ever meet.

I’ve mentioned it a number of times before but the Alzheimer’s Society Dementia Friends initiative is excellent. Explains the disease in simple non medical terms and how to better support your loved one. Really helped me understand things better.
The Alzheimer’s Society support line is very good for advice.
https://www.dementiafriends.org.uk/

Look after yourself and her and feel free to unload on here.

Its a real bastard isnt it

My ma (RIP) started hitting my dad, completely out of character. We ended up having to have her sectioned as she refused help or to see a doctor and we were left with no alternative. Its extremely hard to say or think it but it was for the best when she went. Before her mind went she knew we loved her so there is that for consolation. All the best.