True story:

I used to get the coach over for the match and this woman (no) and her daughter (very much so) were always on it.

One week, the woman asked if I went the match, and then told me she and the daughter had been picked for that Soccer AM style thing they had for a while. She didn't want to do it, and they knew no-one else, so could me and a mate do it.

So me and my brother agreed to do it, and ended up sat with them in the shitty seats* they allocated you. Luckily, there was a fault with the mechanism, so we couldn't do it (and I started getting the train).

Day made even worse (a tedious 1-1 draw with Boro) by the fit daughter shouting out "PUT THEM TO THE SWORD, EVERTON!"

I think they were special needs kids, EITC etc.