Popped in to Greggs bakery in town yesterday evening to grab a bottle of water and there were a bunch of kopites sat round a table in matching replica shirts stuffing their gobs with steak bakes with the filling dripping down their horrible shirts all being incredibly racist.

One fella got so agitated he tried to get up and leave because he said ‘this isn’t the country that Shanks built’ but his wife managed to calm him down long enough for her to get a second doughnut.