Falcon's Big Meal

Chapter 1 Stuart Swallowed

Falcon was angry that the mouse had tried to shoot him with an arrow. He considered dropping him from the top of the tower and letting him be flattened as a pancake on the sidewalk way below. However, another idea crossed his mind. "Hey Stuart, ever see the inside of a falcon before?" he asked, grinning, as he continued to hold the mouse with his talons.
"Um, no, I haven't. And I'm not sure I want to."
"That's ok. I'll let you see mine, for free too."
"That's quite alright, Falcon, but I think I'll pass on that one."
"Nah. I insist. First let me take off those clothes of yours. After all, you won't need them, not where you're going."
"Falcon, stop!" Margalo, his assistant, who stole items for him, flew at him, desperate to save the mouse, who it seemed had become her new boyfriend. She bit him in the leg, to try and stop him from swallowing the mouse. He quickly seized her with a talon.
"Margalo, you stupid bird! You shouldn't have done that. Now, I'm going to store you in the can, where you go when you're bad. I'm afraid I cannot fit both of you in my stomachs at once. So I think I'll swallow and digest your friend first and make you listen to him as my belly sizzles him away. Then, after I poop what's left of him out, you can make the trip down my gullet and be digested next."
"Falcon, no! Don't eat us!"
"Time for some solitary confinement." Falcon said, dropping her into the paint can and sealing it shut. "Now, where were we little mouse? Oh yeah, time to strip you of your clothes and swallow you." He pulled off the mouse's shirt, pants, and underwear, leaving him totally naked. He then raised the struggling rodent toward his beak, which opened, sending the foul odor of his breath washing over him.
"You need a breath mint!" Stuart gagged.
"It's a pity I can't have gum. I don't have teeth to chew it. So excuse my breath. But you'll get used to it, where you're going."
"Don't swallow him!" Margalo yelled from inside the can.
THEWP! THEWP! THEWP! THEWP! THEWP! Falcon licked the mouse's naked body over with his tongue. Stuart was really coated in saliva, including in areas he definitely didn't want to be coated in saliva. "Stop it Falcon! This feels uncomfortable!" Stuart yelled.
"You don't know what discomfort is. But you will soon. Just wait till you're inside my stomachs."
"Falcon, please! I can get you lots of rings. Don't eat him."
"The only rings you two will be giving me now are twirling lumps of feces as you exit my cloaca after I'm done digesting you." Falcon laughed. He tossed Stuart into his mouth and sucked on him. SCHLUCK! SCHLUCK! SCHLUCK! SCLUCK! "Quite good tasting." After he'd sucked on him, he pushed the mouse toward the back of his throat, then swallowed him with a strong GULLLLLLLLLLLLLP! He went down his throat, struggling helplessly. After half a minute, he came to rest inside the crop. "Welcome to purgatory. This is my crop, where you won't suffer, too much. But your next stops are my stomachs, the proventriculus and gizzard. Now those are going to be hell!" he cackled, rubbing the bulge in his next that was Stuart. Margalo sobbed helplessly from inside the paint can.

Chapter 2 Stuart Digested

Falcon rubbed the bulge on his neck that was the mouse. Stuart squirmed inside the crop, which had started to contract around him, squeezing his body. This was particularly uncomfortable, due to Falcon having taken off all of his clothes before swallowing him. The mouse was being squeezed in places he definitely didn't want to be squeezed. "Falcon, let me the #### outta here!" the mouse yelled.
"Why should I? You're serving your purpose as food, or you soon will be. I thought I'd let you rest in here for a while. In the meantime, it's half off day at that burger stand down there. I think I'll place an order, to help wash down that mouse appetizer."
"No, Falcon, I'm not meant to be food!"
"There are billions of mice on this planet. What other purpose do they serve than as the food of birds and cats?"
"I can do a lot of things."
"Feel free to do them then."
"It's kind of cramped in here to do anything."
"You rodents are always whining. Always have some excuse."
"Maybe you could spit me out."
"Nah, that's too much work."
Falcon flew down from the tower and to the burger stand. He ordered a burger and a shake. These, he ate and drank, splattering Stuart in the crop. "Hungry, mouse? I sent you some food." Falcon laughed, rubbing the bulge in his crop that was Stuart.
"I've lost my appetite." the mouse groaned.
"You should still eat. You're going to be digested within a few hours. Might as well eat a last meal."
"Don't the condemned usually get to pick their own last meal?"
"Maybe in a prison, but not with me."
ERRRRRRRRP! Falcon belched. "PU!" Stuart gagged.
"I always burp when I enjoy a meal."
Half an hour later, the crop began to contract. "What's going on?" Stuart asked.
"Oh, nothing, just my crop moving my food to the first stomach."
"Falcon, please stop! Don't digest me!"
The muscles moved Stuart until he was inside the elongated, but cramped, proventriculus. A mere 10 minutes after entering, acid began to enter, burning at the mouse's body. "Falcon, help!"
"Poor little mouse. Poor little mouse! See how he digests! See how he digests! The stomachs burned and blistered him until he screamed. The falcon didn't let him out because he was mean. This was just the beginning of the poor little mouse's pain. The belly sizzled and contracted around him till it drove him insane! And it jus got worse from there. For poor little mouse couldn't flee anywhere. It broke him down as he screamed in a fit. It broke him down until he was nothing but bones and bird shit. His digestion was a glorious event. And at the end the falcon shit him out his vent. The poor little mouse!" Falcon sang to the tune of Three Blind Mice.
"I don't think that's how the song goes." Stuart said.
"This is my version."
"I don't like this version very much."
"Well, it's my favorite."
True to Falcon's ominous lyrics, the proventriculus didn't merely spray him with acid, but also began to contract around the mouse as peristalsis began to process him. He'd been in a tight space already, but this just made it worse. His muscles and bones soon ached from the repeated muscular contractions. After an hour of this, in addition to having his fur singed off, his bones were aching and a few were broken. "Please, Falcon, have mercy!" he cried in anguish.
"Nope. Mercy's not my thing. Now shut up and digest, will you!"
He spent three hours in here, losing all of his fur and breaking more bones. It was starting to burn into his muscles as he felt the chamber begin to contract. "Are you spitting me out?" the mouse asked hopefully.
"Nope. Just my body sending you to the next stomach, the gizzard. It's the grinding stomach. You may have noticed that I don't have teeth. Well, the gizzard serves the role of a bird's teeth for grinding up food, like you."
"No, no, no!" the mouse cried as he was squeezed through another tight tube and deposited into the gizzard.

Margalo, from inside the can, could hear Stuart's anguished cries and hear Falcon's stomachs growling louder and louder. She sobbed and wailed, lamenting what she had brought upon Stuart. "Falcon, please, let him out!"
"Nope. I'm not due for a bowel movement until after I digest him first."
"Falcon, spit him out. You can have me instead."
"Aw, how sweet. But don't worry, you're next birdie."
Stuart was slowly ground upon as the gizzard scraped against him, now peeling off flesh. It was a terrible way to die. EERRRRRRRRRRRRP! Falcon belched, making him vomit. "A full gizzard. A nice meal to digest. What more could a falcon want?" Falcon sighed contentedly, patting his belly.
"Maybe a woman. That is, if any would have you."
"Oh a few do, in a fling here and there. But none to really settle down with."
The digestion intensified until it finally killed Stuart. The mouse cried out "Bye Margalo!" before he died.
"Oh Stuart, what have I done to you!" Margalo screamed in anguish.
"Not to worry, he was just fulfilling his natural role in the food chain." Falcon laughed. ERRRRRRRRP! He belched up some mouse fur. "Your friend is repeating on me."
"Falcon, you have no heart!"
"At least I have some stomachs. And you're going to be intimately familiar with them soon. After I'm done digesting mouse boy, I'll be having canary. Well, I'd better take a little snoozer. Digesting a meal takes up a lot of energy after all. Goodnight."

Chapter 3 Stuart Disposed

Over the next 15 hours, what was left of Stuart travelled out of the stomach and through his short intestines and were now waiting in his cloaca, his opening for releasing feces, urates, and sperm. PHHHHHBT! Gas burst out out of his vent. "Guess it's time for me to take a shit." he said. He moved toward the can. "Well, I've digested your friend. Now I need to shit him out. Hope you don't mind, Margalo, but this falcon needs to use the can." Falcon said. He sat on the can, squatting, lifting his tailfeathers out of the way of his cloaca, his opening for urine, feces, and for reproductive purposes. PHHHHHHBT! Gas exited out his vent. The flatulence echoed in the can and made the bird gag. Margalo could only look up as Falcon began to void his wastes. SPLORT! SPLORT! SPLORT! Urates, which were semi-solid waste products that birds generated due to lack of a bladder, exited his quivering cloaca. Some of these narrowly missed Margalo. She thought it low that the bird was taking a dump with her still in the can. PHHHHHBT! PHHHHT! More foul gas exited the falcon's cloaca, causing the canary to vomit from the foul odor.

PWICA! PWICA! PWICA! His cloaca began to bulge, as blackish feces crowned out, squelching past the vent and dangling over the paint can. PLOP! One lump fell, landing with a SPLAT in the can and bursting apart, revealing a bone, a tooth, and some mouse fur. Margalo sobbed. "Poor Stuart!"
"You don't like your boyfriend's new form?" Falcon cackled, as more urates exited out his back end with a SPLORT! SPLORT! SPLORT! "I'll admit, he's not much good now, save perhaps to use as fertilizer, now that I've digested him."
"Falcon, you're such a monster!"
"Don't bother me right now, Margalo. I'm poopin'!"
PHHHHHBT! More gas exited his cloaca. PHHHHBT! PHHHBT! SPLORT! SPLORT! PWICA! PWICA! PWICA! PWICA! PLOP! PWICA! PWICA! PLOP! More feces and urates exited the cloaca. Falcon grunted hard with an UNNNNNNH as he felt something large and hard push against his vent. It finally came out with a loud PWICA and fell with a PLOP, landing in the can. It was Stuart's skull. Margalo really sobbed now. Falcon continued to empty out the rest of his bodily wastes, leaving piles of bones, fur, teeth, feces, and urates in the case beside Margalo. When the last waste had exited with a SPLORT, PWICA, and PLOP, he used the late Stuart's clothes to wipe his cloaca clean, dropping the soiled material into the can.

"Falcon, I hope you burn in hell!" Margalo shouted.
"I don't think so. But you're about to burn inside my stomach. Soon, you'll look just like your boyfriend!" Margalo turned pale as Falcon's talons reached into the can, pulling her up toward him. His gizzard growled. "Lunch time!" he cackled.

Chapter 4 Margalo Swallowed

Falcon took off her scarf and helmet and took away her pin. "You won't need these anymore." he said. He proceeded to lick her over with his tongue. Then, using the leftover ketchup and mustard packets he had collected after he'd had the burger with earlier, he squirted them on Margalo, then placed her into his mouth, or her head anyway, with her legs sticking out, and began to suck on her. "Soon, you'll be falcon poop, just like Stuart." The canary screamed. She didn't want to be eaten alive! She didn't want to be digested alive like Stuart had been! She struggled with all over her might. "Your struggles are useless, canary!" Falcon cackled. SCHLUCK! SCLUCK! SCLUCK!
"Falcon, don't do this!"
"Falcons have to eat too."
"Eat something else!"
"Why? You're right here."
She was beginning to be moved down the throat, which opened before her like an evil chasm, a pit where she would be cast into and left to rot, only, here it would be worse, for the falcon's innards would digest her alive. Soon, only her feet were sticking out of the bird's mouth. She struggled to keep from being pushed further down the throat, where half her body now was. She felt a wet stickiness on her feet. Falcon was licking her toes! She struggled to resist the urge to squirm, but soon succumbed, twitching and allowing Falcon to swallow her, as he had done to Stuart, with a strong GULLLLLLLLP! She went down his throat, screaming and flailing, until she came to rest in his crop. ERRRRRRRP! He belched, shaking her and making her gag. "Welcome to my crop. It only gets worse from here."

Chapter 5 Margalo Digested

Margalo struggled inside the crop for the next two hours, but it did her no good. It was hot in here and she had little to no room to move. She was shaken every time Falcon laughed at her misfortune. After the crop, she was moved into the proventriculus, where digestion began. At first, it began as an itch, then increased to a burn, and, soon, began to ouright burn off feathers. After two hours of this, it had burned off all of her feathers and was now burning off bear skin. "Falcon, spit me out! Remember all I've done for you! I can't do it for you if you digest me!"
"You did a lot, but now you're soft. And you'll become softer when you're digested, and really soft once you become falcon poop.."
"I don't want to be falcon poop!"
"Too late. Road's closed behind you. My digestive system is a one-way street."
"I don't want to die!"
"Aw, poor little thing. Cry me a river!"
Despite her struggles, she couldn't get him to vomit her up. After five hours, in which she was badly burned, she was moved to the gizzard. Here, she really wailed, as she was slowly ground up alive like hamburger. Her flesh was now outright ripped off and it felt as though she were being rubbed onto sandpaper, slowly ground apart. It was a terrible way to die, and it took her two hours before she succumbed to her fate.
ERRRRRRRRRP! "Mmmmm, good meal. Now to wait for nature to take its course." the falcon said, patting his stomach.

Chapter 6 Margalo Disposed

Flies buzzed by the can, eating up the leftovers of Stuart Little. They fled as Falcon approached, squatting down. He'd digested Margalo and now it was time to let out what he couldn't digest. PHHHHHHHBT! Gas exited out the cloaca. As the vent began to turn, urates squirted out with a SPLORT! SPLORT! SPLORT! SPLORT! This was followed by PWICA! PWICA! PWICA! PLOP! PWICA! PWICA! PWICA! PLOP! As fecal matter exited next, containing feathers and a few bones. He continued to empty out more gas, urates, and feces with more PHHHHHBTS! SPLORTS! PWICAS! And PLOPS! He strained as he pushed against Margalo's impacted skull, but soon had it it. It had landed on top of Stuart's, which had landed upright, so that to the two skulls were now kissing. How appropriate! He contained to vacate the rest of his waste. Once done, he wiped his cloaca clean, using Margalo's scarf. He'd keep the helmet around for himself.

Over the next several days, he'd empty out more wastes, filling up the paint can until it was full. Then he dumped it some distance away, on a lawn, at night, so nobody could see him. Eventually, the poop would turn to dirt and the two lovers would be buried forever.