(Warning, contains scat, urine, and full tour)
Part 1: Stinkbug Snack
Timon the Meerkat lived with his best friend Pumba the Warthog. They were sometimes visited by Simba and his wife Nala, both friends of theirs, but, as the two were King and Queen of Pride Rock, they were often busy.
Today, Pumba had gotten in an argument with some stinkbugs. They had gotten mad and squirted liquid into Pumba's eyes. Though Timon knew his best friend would recover in the next day or two, he wanted to teach the stinkbugs a lesson. However, as they weren't fully grown, he didn't want to kill them. Finally, he got an idea of how to punish them.
Timon grabbed them. "Don't kill us." they said. "I won't kill you. I'll just swallow you whole." said the meerkat. Timon opened his mouth. He brought one of the stinkbugs near it. "Noooo!" said the stinkbug. Timon licked the stinkbug. THEWP! THEWP! THEWP! "Stop!" THEWP! THEWP! "No!" THEWP! THEWP! THEWP! "Ahhhhh!" THEWP! THEWP! The stinkbug kept whining and Timon kept licking.
Finally, he put the stinkbug in his mouth. The stinkbug tried to spray him, but missed. Timon moved the bug past the first row of teeth. He sucked on him for a bit.
Timon then moved him past his second row of teeth. "Noooo!" said the stinkbug. He hung on the edge of the throat. Timon swallowed several times. Finally, he got the bug to lose his grip. The bug slid down his throat. There was a loud gulping sound around him. He entered the stomach. It was pitch black in here. The other stinkbugs whimpered.
The stinkbug tried to get out. However, the entrance to the stomach was above him and he couldn't reach. The entrance to the small intestine was below him and he couldn't get it open. He pounded on the stomach walls. ERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRP! Timon belched. The stinkbug gagged.
Eventually, Timon had swallowed all of the stinkbugs. "What do we do now?" moaned a stinkbug. "Rub my belly so you don't get digested." said Timon.
The stinkbugs rubbed his belly. Digestive juices came in and burned them. However, they did not die. "How do we get out of here?" asked a stinkbug. "You'll come out the other end when I take a dump." said the meerkat. The stinkbugs all groaned.
His stomach rumbled. He patted it. The stinkbugs moaned. BURRRRRRPPP! The meerkat belched again. The stinkbugs kept rubbing for hours. Timon went to sleep.
The next morning, the stinkbugs were scalded. They kept rubbing. Timon ate some other bugs, which coated the stinkbugs. After some time, they were moved into the small intestine.
In here, lots of villi pulled at them. The villi were pink and sent a green substance at them that tried to break them down, without success. The gas in here smelled terrible. They went through the rest of the small intestine.
Timon emptied out his rectum. He wanted to make sure the bugs learned their lesson so he would make them wait in a lot of poop. The bugs, meanwhile, came into his colon. Lots of brown meerkat shit landed on them. It smelled awful. It slowly coated the stinkbugs. They went through the rest of the large intestine. They fell into the rectum. There was a lot of poop in here.
"Let us out!" cried the stinkbugs. Timon farted. PHHHHHHHH! The stinkbugs moaned. Timon waited till the next day. His rectum was quite full.
He hunched over and grunted. Light came into the chamber. They heard sucking sounds coming from below. The poop level drained. They fell out the anus. Lots more poop came out after them.
"Time to wash you off!" said the meerkat. Timon aimed his white penis at the stinkbugs and peed. The hot yellow urine soaked them. The stinkbugs eventually broke free. They took off, terrified.
Pumba came by. "Hey buddy, did you take care of the stinkbugs?" he asked. "Yep." said the meerkat. "What did you do?" said the warthog. "Well, let's just say I gave them a really crappy day." said Timon, smiling.
Part 2: Centipede Cereal
Sometime after the stinkbug incident, some centipedes had been bothering Simba's young daughter Kiara. Finally, Simba, learning of how Timon had handled the stinkbug incident, gave him a royal edict asking him to deal with the problem. Timon happily complied.
As the centipedes came to bother the young lioness again, the meerkat caught them and pinned them all down. "To make you all pay for messing with kids, I'm gonna swallow you all whole." said Timon. He put one of them in his mouth. The centipede yelled. "Noooo!" "Mmmmmm!" said Timon, sucking on him.
After sucking on him for a bit, he swallowed him whole. He slid down Timon's throat. Timon felt him enter the stomach.
The centipede yelled as he slid down the throat. He was pulled downward. There was a loud gulping sound all around him. He fell through an opening and landed in the mongoose's stomach.
"Let me out!" the centipede begged. BURRRRRRRP! Timon burped. The centipede gagged. "You can rub my belly from the inside so that you don't get digested." said the mongoose. Timon ate the rest of the centipedes.
"How do we get out?" said a centipede. "You go into my intestines. After that, I shit you out." said Timon, licking his lips. All the centipedes groaned.
Stomach acid came into his stomach. It burned them. They rubbed his stomach wall so that they didn't get digested too much. Timon drank water. It landed in his stomach and soaked the centipedes.
Timon napped. The centipedes were singed by his stomach acid. After many hours, they were moved downward. They were squeezed into his small intestine.
In here, his villi yanked at them. They were really annoyed. They gagged at the smell of the gas in there. They thought that they could hear the meerkat's heartbeat. They went through the rest of the small intestine.
In the large intestine, meerkat feces landed on them. They gagged at the smell. Also, the gas REALLY smelled bad in here. They got really coated in the poop. They went through the rest of the large intestine. They fell downward. They landed in his rectum.
Poop piled on top of them. "Let us out!" cried a centipede. PHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Timon let out a big gasser that would have made Pumba proud. The centipedes gagged and threw up.
After some time, Timon hunched down and grunted. They saw light come into the chamber. They heard sucking sounds from below. They were moved downward. They fell out the anus with a plop. Then, they got hit with a bunch of urine that shot out of Timon's white penis. When the meerkat was done, he said to them "Now, get out of the Pride Lands!" They didn't need telling twice and left right away without looking back.
A while later, Simba came to them. "Did you deal with them?" he said. "Yep. Crappiest day they ever had." said Timon.
Part 3: Warthog Watermelon
Timon was with his pal Pumba. They had eaten grubs. They had just found a bunch of watermelon. They both were eating it. Just then, Nala came by.
"Wonderful news. Kovu and Kiara have had a son." she said. "Wonderful!" said Pumba. The warthog wasn't paying attention. He ate the watermelon. Unfortunately, he ate the one Timon was eating. Worse, he ate Timon with it. Timon went down his throat and entered his stomach.
"Hey!" said Timon. "Sorry." said Pumba. They soon agreed that it would be best for Timon to go out the other end.
"I hate this!" said Timon. "So sorry." said Pumba. Pumba cried. "I'm a failure!" said Pumba.
"Don't worry buddy, it was an accident." said Timon. "I'm so sorry." said Pumba. "It happens." said Timon.
Acid came in. It kind of burned Timon, though Timon was able to bear it. Pumba, unlike Timon, who could eat mice, scorpions, and snakes, only ate grubs, so his acids weren't as strong as Timon's. Still, Timon was annoyed. The watermelon was broken down. Eventually, Timon went into the small intestine.
Villi pulled at him. He was really annoyed. He went through the rest of the small intestine.
In the large intestine, smelly warthog crap landed on them. He was annoyed. Pumba farted a lot. Timon was really annoyed. He went through the rest of the large intestine. He fell into the rectum.
He kicked the anal wall, but Pumba was asleep. "Let me out! Let me out!" said Timon.
"Let me out!" Timon said again. More poop fell on top of him. Worse, Pumba farted. "Ecccch!" said Timon. Timon had to spend several hours in there. Lots of smelly poop kept piling on top of him.
When Pumba awoke, Timon was asleep. Pumba felt that he had to poop. So he went. Timon came out. Pumba, who was quite sleepy, had forgotten about Timon. So he peed. Timon got soaked. "Hey, stop it!" said Timon. "Sorry!" said Pumba.
Timon got out of the mound of warthog crap. He went and washed off. This was more of his pal than he had ever cared to see.