[ Post a Response | Dory's ]
Posted by Kasey on April 24, 2009, 12:57 am
71.32.39.28
I guess this is funny depending on which side of the fence you are on.
A new sign in the Bank Lobby reads:
'Please note that this bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts.'
'After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE Procedures have been developed. Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender.'
MALE PROCEDURE:
1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Put down your car window.
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Put window up.
7. Drive off.
**********************************************
FEMALE PROCEDURE:
1. Drive up to cash machine.
2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.
3. Set parking brake, put the window down.
4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.
5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up.
6. Attempt to insert card into machine.
7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.
8. Insert card.
9. Re-insert card the right way.
10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.
11. Enter PIN.
12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
13. Enter amount of cash required.
14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.
15. Retrieve cash and receipt.
16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.
17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of checkbook.
18. Re-check makeup.
19. Drive forward 2 feet.
20. Reverse back to cash machine.
21. Retrieve card.
22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided!
23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.
24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
25. Redial person on cell phone.
26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
27. Release Parking Brake.
195
Responses:
For those who might be late comers to this board, Dory was a poster who we will remember as one who gave of herself so others survivors might smile. She always kept this board moving with her inspirational poems, jokes and riddles. Most will give Dory credit for energizing this board. She was an inspiration to everyone on this board. In that spirit, let us
continue to post in Dory’s memory so she might smile down on us and give us the same inspiration. Therefore, we have named the board, Dory's Board, in her memory. 11/11/01 (Dory was the first to call attention to the significance of 9/11, re: WTC tragedy, i.e. 911 for emergency). Let me be the first to note all the ones in the above date, indicating she was No. 1 on our board.