I was able to have a lumpectomy, but I did have positive lymph nodes, so had to have them removed, then 8 rounds of chemo and 33 days of radiation. All in all, it wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be.
Like Mary said, please contact your local Cancer Society to see if you can get a 'cancer coach'. I had a phone nurse through my insurance company. I was able to call her whenever I had a question, and she checked on me a couple of times a week.
Never be worried about calling your doctor's office (surgeon, oncologist, etc) about any question or anything you feel isn't quite right. This is the time in your life that you will need to take control of your health.
Get a copy of your records, including blood tests, if you will be having them regularly. If you need chemo, you'll have them before each treatment. I started a notebook, and wrote down questions in my notes section of my phone so I wouldn't forget at my appointment.
This can be a very stressful time. Try to take it easy. I'm so sorry about your Mom. I hope she is made comfortable so you won't have to worry about that.
Prayers and HUGS as you travel with us on your journey. Ask any question, whine, cry, or whatever you want. Post as often as you want and you can write 10,000 words if you'd like!