I've been a nonsmoker for all of my life. I only dabbled with cigarettes for a short time in college many years ago. An online girl friend I had been chatting with for a couple of years one night said it would be hot for me to smoke for her on cam. After telling her I was a non smoker she begged me to at least try. Well, I had a lot to drink that night and my judgment must have been a bit cloudy so I walked to the local convenience store and bought a pack. On cam I sort of choked coughed and sputtered through about 3 cigarettes before giving up. I thought I was done with the whole exercise and threw the pack in the waste basket. The next evening after I got home from work I spotted the partially used pack in the trash and something came over me to just try again. "After all", I thought, "I paid for the pack why not try at least once more." Over the next three evenings I puffed on a few and it got better and better. On the last evening it suddenly hit me like a freight train; a rush and a high I had never experienced before in my life. Right now I'm waiting for the sore throat and upper airways irritation to subside. But I'm not sure what is happening to me and conflicted about continuing to experiment.