[ Post a Response | The Sublime Desire of Cigarette Smoking ]
Posted by Hey Now I've been perusing this here board with just less than great interest since I discovered it a month ago! I find 'the other Bob's' insight extremely thought provoking. I am totally aware that my smoking fetish took hold of me when I was about 14 and used to watch the 'bad girls' (yet, totally HOT girls, too) smoke at the local gaming arcade. This was back in the middle to late seventies. Same with pot. Of course I loved to do both. For some reason, I just couldn't sacrifice my public image. On one hand, it was frustrating as hell, when I thought of how I should be hanging out with the 'Drut Squad' (that was our school's term for the smoker/drinker/partier types. Get it? TURD spelled backwards...?). Interesting how we are isn't it? So, the other Bob, what really jolted me and caused me to make a connection was your parents talking on the way home... My story goes like this: Well, I had already started, and the sexual connection thing had already started too. Hey, what can I say? I think that my mother saying those things to me made me want to smoke even more when I think about it! Hey, Vesperae, thank you for the great board. You really put an interesting spin on this subject of risk.
on July 28, 2007, 1:59 am, in reply to "Re: Yes, risk NOT death"
Ok, I guess it's my time to put in my two cents or so.
As a kid, I was aware of my image as a good kid, someone that would never do anything as wrong as smoke cigarettes.
Still do.
Funny, I used to privately relate to the kids that partied and smoked and all, but me, I hung out with the 'go getters', the clean bunch.
On the other hand, I took a supreme delight in having this secret identity of being just like them, yet I was not looked upon with distaste and scorn as they were.
My mother and I were driving through town one day.I was just starting to smoke, in great privacy of course, all by myself. We went by the pizza place where the DRUTS smoked out in back of. There were a bunch of girls (!!!) smokng and my mom said to me, "If only they knew how awful they looked doing that. What a filthy thing to do. I can't see why anyone would want to smoke, especially at that young age."
She turned to me and said, "Hey Now,(not my real name), I hope you don't ever decide to do that, I really do, It's an awful habit to start."
I replied, "Of course I wouldn't do that mom. Smoking is dumb."
I know that her remarks have every thing to do with the fact that at 44 yrs old I still am a closet smoker too. I couldn't bear the thought of my parents knowing I smoke. Funny how complex creatures we are isn't it?
Love it.
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