thank you for your responses. I suffered form paruresis since I was 11 or 12 and remember being bullied for being slow when goint to the toilet at home. When I was about 24 I heard of shy bladder and was sent to fysiotherapy sessions, which didn't do much to help the problem.
I found the first workshop I attended difficult, although I liked meeting fellow sufferers and didn't mind most of them being men.
I try desensing at home now with a young men who has the same problem, but it's more difficult for me to let him come close to the bathroom. He on the other hand is doing fine.
As you mentioned the strategic thinking about fluid intake, safe bathrooms and travel I must say those are always on my mind.
Since 30 the problems have increased or at least have been noticed more by others and I occasionally use catheters even if I have visitors at home...
Still, I hope some day this problem will get a little better or that I will accept it as part of who I am.
Right now I'm planning on working from home, so I won't have to deal with busy toilets at work...I know this means I am avoiding the issue, but I really want to work and be able to stay healthy as well. Having back problems too this seemed the best solution for now.
The last thing I want to say is that I really dislike the way some people judge us for having this problem. After all, it's not something one chooses to have and neither does it say anything about you as a person.
I'll be celebrating my birthday soon, but don't know if I can manage too go with many people at home. Maybe I shoudn't celebrate at all or in a café, because I don't want to hurt myself with catheters in order to have fun.
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