I have had paruresis most of my adult life, (I'm 66). Since I've been single and enjoy socialising it seems to have affected my life more. I used not to avoid doing anything because of it, but following some very stressful and painful episodes I've now become more cautious, especially regarding travelling. I have a good life but it would be much better without having to worry about weeing, plan fluid intake etc. before every occasion - and I would like to choose a holiday without considering the same!
I've been on a couple of workshops, and made progress in a weekend through desensing, but cannot get any further without a pee buddy. I don't have so much of a problem when I'm out alone, as there is no pressure - if I can't go in one department store I can just go to another - with the result that I can go anyway. It's when I'm out with friends or on a trip or walk with a group that I lock up and can't go unless I can get to the loo without them!
Maybe if there are enough women posting on here to be interested, we could have a women's workshop. Or I found it surprisingly OK going to a mixed one as long as there is another female there to "practice" with. Because men and women all share the same kind of fears, it did not seem embarrassing to talk together.
The only technique I have found which helps at all is to think about something completely different like what I was doing all day yesterday or planning tomorrow etc. But it only works if the stress level is not too high, otherwise no go.
Hope to hear from other ladies on here, have you found anything which has helped you? Jane
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