This Discussion Board is for men who
find it difficult or impossible to urinate in a public or social situation. Women should use the women's Board.
The Board is maintained and moderated by the
U.K. Paruresis Trust. Registered Charity no: 1109541.
further information, visit our website, or contact us at
I have suffered from paruresis for as long as I can remember. To a very large extent it has defined my life, limiting opportunities in work, travel, and my personal life. Around the year 2000 I sought hypnotherapy, which was not successful but at least gave me the chance to talk to someone who took the problem seriously. As I got older, I took less and less risks until I could feel my world shrinking. Finally, about 3 years ago, I felt on the verge of collapse and went to my GP, who knew nothing about the condition, but through him I was able to get some CBT, which has at least restored my stability and given me some useful tools to help. I knew by then of course that there were many other sufferers, but I have always been too ashamed to speak about my condition. I always use a cubicle to urinate, preferring as secluded a facility as possible, preferably with a full length solid door. Travel is almost impossible, because of the fear that I will be unable to find any suitable toilets en route or at my destination. What I need to know, obviously, is where to go (in both senses). Last year, an idea occurred to me. What if sufferers around the country were to pool their knowledge and review which toilets they considered "safe" in their own local area? Could we build a map of the country as a free website which anyone could consult, enabling some peace of mind when travelling? It`s possible that such a resource already exists, and I have simply not encountered it (in which case, please tell me where it is!). If not, could we organise one? I know it would be of benefit to me. I`d like to know if other people with paruresis think this is a good idea, and whether anyone would be willing to contribute.