Your father is seriously out of court with his behaviour. I suspect you are not assertive? Could you let him know in no uncertain terms how unhelpful and insensitive he is being, and that a father is supposed to be a protector of his children, not a persecutor.
Point out that there is a charity for this condition i.e. the UKPT. To be a charity you have to have a professional reference, as proof that this condition is a known medical one.
Re Italy: get yourself along to your GP and ask to be shown how to self-catheterise. This will allow you to empty your bladder in any situation. Having a catheter on you as a fall back will remove so much anxiety "about being trapped" that you may well find you dont need to use it. BTW women's catheters are so small that they fit into a lipstick shaped container, to go in your handbag.
GPs vary in their reaction to such a request. If negative, politely but firmly ask them what you are supposed to do when you lock up, go to A&E? Point out again that the UKPT exists, as proof that the condition exists.
Basically come to terms that you have to live your life and other people will have to get lost if they do not help you.
Hope this helps
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