1) Vernie made a good suggestion about posting on the main board. There are lots of people who will see your post and offer ideas.
2) Most importantly, and I know it's tough, you WILL get through this.
3) Did your surgeon give you clear viable options about reconstruction, I would imagine when you say no oncologist to see it's because you don't need chemo etc so now it's an issue of reconstruction.
4) Request a quiet sit down with your surgeon and make it clear about how sad you are about the current status of things and that HE or SHE needs to make you feel better and assure you of exactly what will happen and when.
5) It's ok to reach out to a mental health professional to talk as well as all of us who are on your side..
Please keep the faith, you'll make it...