Posted by neo with hindsight i can see that i've been in denial and it took an act of desperation by my partner to finally get the message home. it wasn't until i could say to her that i've been disconnected from my feelings that the spell broke. that lanced the boil and opened up a whole load of painful stuff for us to each work through. i'm hopeful that we can emerge from this together, and perhaps stronger. however, i guess that depends on where our respective processes take us...
on 6/12/2005, 9:32 am, in reply to "Re: hello!"
80.176.159.218
yes, now that i've been able to recognise that i have work to do it does feel as if we're together in this, but it's taken me a long time to wake up and smell the roses!
--Previous Message--
: : It's very positive and inspirting
: that you and your partner are coming
: to this realization TOGETHER. That's
: something I envy. Keep up the deep
: work
: --Previous Message--
: hi Linda, good to hear from you.
: it's
: inspiring to know that you've been
: working with EC for so long and have
: such a strong commitment to it.
:
: bodywork (and breathwork) is a
: challenge for me too. i've flirted
: with yoga and did some self-taught
: t'ai chi for a while, but nothing's
: stuck. maybe there's more of an
: incentive now.
:
: i'm presently in the middle of a
: crisis with my partner of nearly 4
: years. we've just realised, with
: considerable shock, the extent to
: which our patterns have locked into
: each other's to repeat past
: abusive/codependant relationships.
:
: a positive outcome for me is that
: some painful supressed/repressed
: feelings have burst through to the
: surface, giving me an opportunity to
: start this integrative work. i've
: realised how out of touch with my
: feelings i've been, and how damaging
: this is, specially to the the one i
: love. the section on relationships
: in John's book is proving specially
: helpful and i know that i have to
: withdraw the projections of love and
: happiness that i've put onto her and
: find them within myself.
:
: it's uncomfortable work, but i
: accept that it's got to be done and
: i'm grateful for the guidance and
: inspiration i'm gaining from EC. it
: feels as if a whole new world may be
: opening up, and that the real me is
: in there somewhere, waiting to
: emerge...
:
: neo
:
:
: --Previous Message--
: Hi neo,
: I tend to adapt John's methods a
: tad, too. But I do think his basic
: guidelines are so solid. I've had a
: hard time with the bodywork part,
: but have given myself a lot of time
: on that part because I have some
: severe abuse issues.
:
: I see this work as a lifelongh
: adaptation and the meditation and
: clearing techniques as something to
: use for the rest of my life.
:
: --Previous Message--
: hello people!
:
: i've arrived here via a circuitous
: route with many blind alleys and
: lost highways! this feels like it
: may be an oasis in the desert...
:
: the catalyst that brought me to
: Emotional Clearing was my partner's
: disillusionment with my inability to
: respond appropriately to her on a
: feeling level. when she all but
: dumped me in frustration, i realised
: how i was hurting her by acting out
: unconscious behaviour patterns
: rooted in disconnection from my
: feelings. i finally accepted that I
: needed therapy. next morning i
: received an email linking to one of
: John's articles...
:
: i've read most of the book and have
: started practising, though i've
: adapted John's process a little.
: right now i feel as if i've been
: thrown out of balance and am
: struggling a bit to keep my mind
: focussed for work purposes, but i'm
: using this to practice acceptance.
: it does feel as if i may be on track
: at last...
:
: i look forward to more sharing...
:
: neo
:
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