Posted by Seth on 6/8/2005, 1:32 pm, in reply to "Re: Φ" To answer your question, yeah I do need others at those times of feeling alienated, but I seem to get exactly the opposite! I've come so far and had growth in so many ways, but life never stops throwing me curve balls. When I'm strong from the inside out, people feel that and enjoy being around me... But where do they go when I have those times when I fall flat on my face?? Whats the point of building your inner beauty if there's nobody to share it with. Sure you can share it with everyone... which I do, but you get so many people that attack you when your full of life that it startes to knock you down. And in thows times when you do get knocked down its just you fighting for yourself to grow past it, its kind of lame. --Previous Message--
24.43.159.18
Thanks for the reply Angela.
I've always wanted or needed friends and especially a significant other to grow with and be teamates with, but everyone I'm ever around helps me grow but its not a shared thing. It's a growth thing because I have to recover from other peoples ignorance. It kind of sucks! It seems so many people just use others to try to acheive what they want, and as soon as a person doesn't deliver for them, they drop them like a hot coal.
I never use anyone, because I cant. That alone gives me strength from within because I'm staying true to a very important part of myself, but you'd think you'd attract others of the same nature.
Places Like this help along with certain books, but really there comes a time when you need something tangible.
: yea I can relate to this........ hiya
: seth, several points here though:
: are you showing that you want people
: when even you feel away from
: yourself.....
:
: and at those times is it others you
: need?
:
: What happens if you stay with that
: discomfort and breathe it breathe it
: and breathe it, what images, senses
: feelings or what ever appear?
:
:
: To illustrate:
:
: I've since found out, to my
: surprise that loneliness covered up
: and showed up my inner child and
: I've had several insights and
: 'viewings' of myself wondering alone
: around my early schools feeling
: alone, and sad, unhappy, and
: realising 'I didnt like school' now
: thats something I know many people
: relate to, however, for me this was
: a revelation! and to own it
: something else, the feelings had
: been so suppressed..I also, for eg,
: felt alienated at school, when my
: dad was very seriously ill in
: hospital, very sad and alone amongst
: the many people messing around as
: usual all around,
:
: These insights have helped the
: puzzle of my life and school is a
: place amongst alot of people, and
: how ever you have to be, to survive
: it, the feelings perceptions of
: those times are still there,
:
: I noted that when I've felt weak
: this relates to vunerability, thats
: covered over feelings of
: inadequacy...et al, what would you
: feel /experience if at the onset of
: reaching for a drug you stay with
: the feeling instead and let the
: subconscious speak/ show you those
: times when you learnt to feel that,
: and sometimes even asking yourself
: 'whats the source of this feeling'
: is enough for various incidents to
: come forward and eventual healing to
: emerge.
:
: What do you do to reconnect when you
: feel disconnected this could be a
: key point, how do you rescue
: yourself at those times?....I find
: breathing and asking for help saying
: how I feel and knowing that an
: answer, an answer insome form is
: there helps, a stillness that
: is...... something worth
: mentioneing, our feelings become so
: ingrained we're so used to our
: particular set that accepting this
: whilst simultaneously deciding how
: we do want to be is very freeing,and
: yea that's ok. This honours the
: feelings for release whilst opening
: to who we are and what wedo want to
: focus on
:
: Hope this helps I feel for you on
: this oneand doing this work, as we
: along time ago acknowledged can in
: some way perpetuate aloneness that
: is until finding out releasing it
: and resonating something different,
: I know I'd love to feel close enough
: to others real time to share , I do
: on a remote level inner
: communication and I feel close to
: source this is beautiful and as such
: I think the aloneness has lessened
: because I feel easier in my own skin
: now. Blessings with this and lots of
: goodness
:
:
:
: --Previous Message--
: Wow when this page dies it really
: dies, I wonder what is up with that?
:
: Anyways I was wondering if anyone
: has ever run into times when they're
: totally alienated? This experience
: is not a normal event to process
: because it's like I'm totally
: disconnected from life itself.
: You see I'm a type a person if I see
: someone totally out of it I'll share
: my presense with them to help them
: feel at ease, but the times when I
: experience alienation in myself, or
: just being uncomfortable in my own
: skin, its like I seem to be shun by
: people, it's really weird. It
: creates a real lonliness, and a
: sense of weakness.
: I think its fair to say that this
: feeling usually shows up as a result
: of some sort of drug use, even
: though I'm really healthy 92.64% of
: the time, but even those break downs
: into drug use are the result of not
: seeming to find a place with other
: people. And the more I grow and
: learn the further my connection with
: others results. Does anyone have
: any thoughts on what sort of
: dynamics might be at work here?
: I'm the biggest Lonner, but that
: isn't my nature at all, it makes no
: sense.
:
:
:
:
:
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