Posted by v r cordier
on 5/2/2009, 7:25 pm, in reply to "Too Intense; Advice Please!!!!"
99.233.247.56
Dear Abigail,
Please read the book a little slower and
pay more attention.The answer to all your questions are right there.
I just finished reading it the 3rd time and beleive will need to study it for a long time.
If you still run into trouble wright again and I will answer your questions one by one.
You are on the right track!
VR
--Previous Message--
: Hello Any and Everyone.
:
: I finished Emotional Clearing a week
: ago and have been meditating and
: doing yoga daily since, both of
: which are brand new practices for
: me.
:
: After 3 days, I began noticing that
: by alternating between
: "holding" the pains in my
: chest and throat (as in a nice soft
: bubble) and breathing prana into
: them, they would eventually release
: warm floods of tingly energy down my
: arms and into my 3rd and 2nd
: chakras. Prior to this pleasant
: release I was feeling the impulse to
: twitch, shake, jerk around in the
: neck and arms as happens in
: "somatic experiencing"
: therapy (something I had a few very
: intense sessions with quite a long
: time ago). I resisted these
: movements, however, afraid that I
: would not be able to integrate the
: experience properly or get out of it
: without reaching the point of
: "overwhelm", something I
: was told I did not want to happen.
: Also it felt quite uncomfortable in
: my neck in the sitting position.
:
: Two days ago I noticed my 1st chakra
: (right in the perineum)vibrating
: like a tiny little drill was in
: there (!!) and then a VERY powerful
: surge of warm tingles started
: pouring upward into my abdomen. As
: the surge was starting I felt like I
: was about to leave/change
: consciousness/check out/lose the
: witness part of the experience which
: was very frightening so I clenched
: down on the whole thing and
: apologized to my body/self for so
: abruptly halting the process.
:
: Immediately afterward and ever since
: I have had cold chills sweeping up
: my legs into my abdomen, diarhea and
: racing heart. TOO MUCH, TOO FAST, I
: say.
:
: So what to do now? I have stopped
: meditating altogether and am
: consciously engaging in displacement
: behaviour, distraction, trying to
: comfort myself with prayer, music,
: pleasant thoughts and safe company.
: At first I was even purposely
: physically blocking the persistent
: tingling at my first chakra. But the
: sensation of fear persisted, of
: course.
:
: Now I know that, according to the
: book, I was doing everything I
: wasn't supposed to do with the fear
: (ie. trying to resupress it) but I
: was afraid of the chakra continueing
: to "leak" fear into my
: system even though I'm not
: meditating anymore or, worse,
: release it like a dam being breached
: and overwhelm me.
:
: So, yes, fear of fear, fear of
: losing control of mind and body,
: fear of losing the witness
: perspective, fear of other chakras
: opening without my wanting them to,
: etc, etc.
:
: The questions for you all: How do I
: slow this down? How do I feel the
: present fear that's been released
: (something I WANT to do) without
: more continueing to flood out before
: I've got some kind of balanced
: relationship with the initial surge?
: I need to develop a much stronger,
: more confident abilitiy to remain in
: the witness, but how do I develop
: that without simultaneously
: releasing more difficult feelings?
: And what are we supposed to do when
: the energy wants to release in the
: form of twitches and tremors (I
: couldn't find mention of such stuff
: in the book)? Also, other books
: (eg. Kornfield's A Path with Heart)
: mention perils of spiritual life
: such as temporary blindness, too
: quick release of kundalini energy,
: hallucinations, days of arm flapping
: and all these other forms of
: "madness" which, of
: course, are all adding tremendously
: to my fear of this experience(!);
: any comments regarding such things
: would be appreciated.
:
: A bit about my circumstances for
: anyone who might wish to respond to
: this: I live almost alone in the
: wilderness (I have wonderful
: neighbors) without easy access to
: phone or computer (which I love!)
: and I have very limited financial
: resources for a therapist. I would
: like to continue this process but in
: a more gentle fashion, if possible.
: And, no, I have no history of mental
: "illness", only the
: run-of-the-mill suppression style we
: all suffer.
:
: Thank you for your time!! Would
: love some feedback! And I wish you
: courageous beings well. Blessings
: to you!
:
: Abigail.
:
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