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Posted by Igor on January 17, 2005, 10:42 pm
I have been married for 3 years to whom I though was the love of my life. We met 12 years ago, she was seeing somebody else and kicked me to the kerb. I lost touch with her for 10 years and we caught up again with each other about 3 years ago. She was seeing somebody else again but this time she decided to be with us both, she would sleep with me and then have the other guy stay over the night as well, she promised there was nothing going on but when i tried to call her in the middle of the night she would take the phone off the hook but surely would call me the next day to apologise. She did break it off with the other guy and I got to spend at least two weeks with her before she fell pregnant with my child. I did the right thing and stood by her, it has now been three years, she has given birth to another baby daughter, and I have tried to set up a family and give them all everything that they need. I have just bought them a new house, she drives my new car after I got my company car, she shops when she wants to and basically she knows I would do anything for her. She stays at home to look after the kids while I work 6 days a week. I come home from work to help her with the kids and I always cook dinner to give her a break from her day as 2 young children are definately a handfull.
The problem is I cant get past the fact that she has slept with four other people before me, that would not be such a problem but she acts completely different sexually towards me than she did for the other people. I know this because she has told me about things that happenned with the other guys plus i have seen pictures where she has a look of happiness I have never seen all the time I have been with her. She constantly rejects me and when something does happen she is either too tired and the whole experience really feels like sleeping with a corpse, there is no affection or desire in her whatsoever.
It has reached the point where I have actually asked her the reason why she is like that with me, I even buy her nice underwear but she just throws it in the wardrove never to be seen again, I plan romantic night with candles but again she is too tired or not in the mood. To say the least this has affected my self esteem to the point where I have even changed at work and cannot relate to my clients anymore.
Everytime I try and talk to her she goes off and accusses me of bringing the same thing up every 3 weeks. When i confront her about seeing the other guy at the same time as she was sleeping with me she just says that we werent officially dating.
I am at my wits end with this problem and would like any advice that might be out there for me.
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