Posted by Tom on 6/12/2006, 11:24 am
24.52.115.50

I know we talked about this before but thought it would be a good time to bring up again. TIME is one of the most difficult things to deal with while going through MLC. We try to get out but when we do, we don't want to return to an empty house. We go for walks, movies, etc, but only return to our situation. That is why we must try to get ourselves to develope a new life style so that not only our getting out removes us from the reality of MLC, but one that puts a new life style in its place on a daily basis. I know many here are really hurting right now. That is just the more that your try to replace your daily minutes of MLC to daily minutes of dealing with normal everyday happenings, whether it is your children, work, house, or whatever. Take action. Get moving. Wallowing away will NOT get you past the hurt. But ACTION towards doing will. Many have asked the old timers to give advise, and many old timers have responded with their best ways to get by this. That being doing things. New things, old things. Just do it. On another area my wife and I have talked many times about when we were dating before our marriage. She lost her former husband to a sudden death. He was a good man and had just retired early to enjoy life. She and I agree that dating was a trip. Scary yes. Odd, yes. Had to be carefull, definitly. But, it gets you out when you are ready. I kept my first dates to a cup of coffee at Borders at first. Nothing was discussed except the formalities of first meeting each other. In this way they were sometimes very short. My wife says it was the same for her, but she wishes she would have kept many, many short. Its crazy but you have to get brave when you are ready, and look at it as another way to grow. Be careful. Be smart. Hold your head high and get out there and share your GOOD with someone that really needs it. Whether it is for a long term relationship or to meet new friends. You have looked at evil in the eye, and said I am going forward with good. Take care all Tom