Posted by Helen on 5/16/2006, 8:33 am, in reply to "Pain And Confusion"
194.128.195.5

Lorrie Three years on and my x is still as cruel and vindictive as ever he was. It does not fade away with them the way we would like it to. It is relentless. Any chance they get to torment you they will use it. I have felt down so many times and it was only family and friends reminding me how awful he was and how lucky I was to be away from him that helped me through. Also, I had to focus on my own happiness by doing things that I enjoyed. My theory is that they are not happy and will never be happy and they can't bear the thought that you may find happiness at some time in the future. They want to demolish any happiness you have. If they had walked away and it was as good as they thought it would be wouldn't they have left you alone? Tried to be kind, out of guilt? No, not a midlifer - they will never be happy and their life now is a succession of let-downs and disappointments. That grass on the other side of the hill turned out to be sand as far as the eye could see. But they aren't man enough to tell you that they were wrong, so instead they pound away at you. You have to tell him, in your mind, NO you will not hurt me anymore. DO YOUR WORST you cretin. You aren't worth anything and I won't stoop down to your level. We are all with you. Try and stay focussed. Show that rat that he will not break you.