[ Message Archive | GraniteCityGossip ]

    Re: Do you have a favorite quote? Archived Message

    Posted by Rootsniners on February 11, 2015, 12:27 pm, in reply to "Do you have a favorite quote? "

    16 Best Police Quotes "That were actually recorded on Patrol Car videos:

    16. "You know, stop lights don't come any redder than the one you just blew through."

    15. "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch after you wear them a while."

    14. "If you remove your hands from the car, I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document."

    13. "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."

    12. "Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second, because, that's the speed of the bullet that will be chasing you?"

    11. "You don't know how fast you were going? I guess that means I can write anything I want to on the ticket, huh?"

    10. "Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I'm the shift supervisor?"

    9. "Warning! You want a warning? O.K, I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket."

    8. "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"

    7. "Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy, corn dogs, and step in farm animal shit."


    6. "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife get’s a new toaster oven."

    5. "In God we trust, all others we run through NCIC."

    4. "How big were those 'two beers' you say you had?"

    3. "No sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to, but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we want."

    2. "I'm glad to hear that the Chief of Police is a personal friend of yours. So you now know someone who can post your bail."

    AND FINALLY....

    1. "You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't. Please sign here!"

    Message Thread: