Season 2: Episode 18 - Sin in the City - The Green-Eyed Monster
Posted by Amber on September 22, 2009, 4:00 pm 72.152.28.155
Emma: "Ye're being completely unreasonable!"
Z: "The hell I am! He had his hands all up in your..."
Emma: *raises eyebrow* "Aye?"
Z: "Lady area."
Emma: "He has tae put them there, you stubborn daftie! It's so he can lift me securely."
Z: "Right."
Emma (annoyed): "I was under the impression you liked my coupon."
Z: "Huh?"
Emma: "Face! I was under the impression you liked my face!"
Z: "I don't just like your face, I love it--down to the last freckle. What does that have to do with anything?"
Emma: "Because Matt puts his hands in my 'lady area' tae keep me from fallin' and smashin' my freckled face into the verra unforgivin' floor!"
Z (darkly): "Well, he doesn't have to look like he's enjoying it so damn much!"
Emma: "Look, I have enough tae worry about without you making me feel guilty for dancing with my partner!"
Z (nastily): "Oh, well, excuuuse me! I'd hate to make things more difficult for you, Princess."
Emma: *inhales through nose* "Why you--"
--Phone Rings--
Emma: "That's Fin. He was supposed tae call me today. I'll be right back you bloody bampot, and then ye're goin' tae get it!" *stalks off*
Z: *swears*
Yuri: "Z!"
Z: *jumps* "Geez, Yuri! I didn't know you were here."
Yuri: "Yes, well, you and Emma were a bit preoccupied upon your arrival. You look exceedingly handsome, darling. What is the occasion?"
Z: *pulls at collar* "I had to present one of my papers today at a department meeting."
Yuri: "Well, come sit down and tell me about it. How did your presentation go?"
Z: "It went fine. My mentor was very pleased, and the department has decided to extend my stipend for another year."
Yuri: "How wonderful!"
Z: "Yeah."
Yuri: "Why do you look so miserable, then? Is it Emma?"
Z: "Yes. Do you know I can't remember the last time I was jealous? *pulls at collar again* I don't really do the whole green-eyed monster thing. Didn't even know I had one."
Yuri: "Everyone has one, darling. Yours was simply lying dormant until the right person came along and prodded it awake."
Z: "I was being a huge ass just now, wasn't I?"
Yuri: "Indeed."
Z: *exhales loudly*
Yuri: "Whatever is worrying you regarding your relationship with Emma, you should talk to her about it, not regress into a troglodyte and shout at her for falsified indiscretions."
Z (tightly): "We don't have a relationship, Yuri."
Yuri: "Nonsense! You two have been practically inseparable since you laid eyes on one another. I assume you mean you do not have a romantic relationship."
Z: "No. Yes. I don't know, okay!"
Yuri: "Then ask her."
Z: *rubs forehead* "We were supposed to have dinner tonight, but she may be too pissed at me to go now."
Yuri: "Apologize for being an idiot. She will forgive you. Are you taking her to the restaurant Kumi and I suggested to you?"
Z: "Yeah."
Yuri: "Excellent."
--Emma walks back in--
Emma: "Now, where were we? Aye, I was about to reach into your geggy and pull out your bawbags one by one."
Z (warily): "I don't know what my geggy is, but I have a feeling 'bawbags' is like 'beanbags'."
Emma: "Aye."
Z: "Then, I'll pass on that, as fun as it sounds. Instead, why don't I apologize for being a complete ass?"
Emma: *cocks eyebrow*
Z: "I was out of line. I'm sorry, Em."
Emma: *nods curtly*
Z: "Are we still having dinner tonight?"
Emma: "Aye. I juice need tae change first."
Z: "I'll wait."
Emma: "Fine." *walks off*
Z: *flops back down on the sofa* "She's still pissed."
Yuri: *straightens Z's tie* "Then it is your responsibility to persuade her into a better frame of mind."
Z: "Yeah, *sighs* I was afraid you were going to say that."
Later that evening...
Emma: "This is lovely, Z."
Z: "You're lovely, Em."
Emma: *smiles* "I've never seen you in a tie before. You look verra posh."
Z (glibly): "I'd rather look like Becks than Posh."
Emma: "Oh, but you do...you juice have tae take your shirt off first."
Z: *laughs*
--Waitress Arrives--
Waitress: *flirty smile at Z* "Hi, I'm Mia, and I'll be your server. Would you care to hear this evening's specials?"
Emma: *scowls*
Z: "Uh, no thanks, we already know what we want."
Mia (suggestively): "Alright. Ready when you are, handsome."
Emma: *crosses arms*
Z (hurriedly): "I'll have the soup to start and the beef filet for the main course, along with whatever beer you have on tap. She'll have the garden salad--dressing on the side--sea bass, and a white wine."
Mia: *appraising look at Emma* "Does she have ID because she looks kinda young. Babysitting tonight, huh?"
Emma: *opens mouth*
Z (smoothly): "You know, Mia, I believe she forgot her ID at home, but I have mine. I'd be happy to show it to you, if you really think it's necessary." *sexy smile*
Mia: *smiles back* "Well, uh, no...that's okay. But, I can only give her one. No refills."
Z: "Great, thanks. We'll make sure she has her ID next time."
Mia: *winks* "Right. I'll be right back with your drinks."
Emma (furiously): "That little slag!"
Z: "Please don't let her ruin our dinner, okay? She's just being a little flirty. It's no big deal."
Emma: "You dinna juice say that tae me! You got mad earlier when Matt was merely doin' his job, and now I'm supposed to juice sit here while that cow drools all over you!"
Z: "I don't give a damn about her! I'm here with you, and it's not like I was encouraging her."
Emma: "Really?! Like I dinna see that smile you gave her towards the end. I'm no' blind!"
Z: "Did you want the wine or not? Look, this isn't Europe. Here you need to be 21 or have a good fake ID to get your booze in a reputable restaurant. Deal with it."
Emma (hotly): "I hate this!"
Z: "Geez, it'll just be for a couple more years, Em. You're almost 19 now. You don't even drink that much anyway."
Emma: "That's no' what I meant! I hate the way girls are always hangin' all over you. I hate that the minute I come out of class, I canna see you for all the giggling tarts who are only interested in one thing--doggin' you."
Z (perplexed): "Doggin' me?"
Emma: "Shagging, screwing, fornicating, fu--"
Z: *holds up hands* "Okay, okay! I got it. Doggin' doesn't mean that here, so I was confused."
Emma (irately): "Actually, it means shaggin' in the back of a car, but I'm sure none of your girls would object to that, either."
Z: "First off, they are not 'my girls'. You are the only girl I want, and I've made that fact abundantly clear. Have I given you any reason to believe I'm interested in anyone else but you?"
Emma (grudgingly): "No."
Z: "You're the one sending mixed signals. What are we doing here, Emma?"
Emma: "What do you want tae be doing?"
Z: "You know the answer to that."
Emma (harshly): "I'm no' sleepin' with you!"
Z: *growls* "That's not what I meant!"
--Mia Deposits Dishes onto Table--
Mia: "Your entrees will be out soon. Do you need anything else?"
Z & Emma (tersely): "No."
Mia: "Uh, okay." *hastily retreats*
Z (abruptly): "I want to date exclusively. I want dinners, movies, walks in the park, all that crap. Okay?"
Emma: *sips wine* "Why?"
Z: "What do you mean 'why'?"
Emma: "Do you want tae date because you like spendin' time with me or because you want tae get in my knickers?"
Z: "Can't it be both?"
Emma: *withering look*
Z: *sighs* "Dammit, Emma. You can be so difficult."
Emma: "Aye, but I'm worth the trouble, make no mistake. If ye're no' up for it, though, you best call *sneers* Mia back over here and ask if you can ring her up instead. Judgin' by the length of her skirt, she'd give you easy access."
Z: "Do I honestly need to tell you how I feel? It's written all over my face."
Emma: *stony silence*
Z: "Fine, but I'm probably going to hit every cheesy cliché known to chick flickdom."
Emma: "I'm no' scoring you on originality, Z, just sincerity."
Z: "Well...I didn't know it until you showed up, but my entire life I've been waiting, no, missing you. And, don't ask me how you can miss someone you didn't even know existed. Spending time with you is all I wanna do, and it's not because I'm trying to get laid. I can get sex whenever I want it. That's not what this is about..."
Emma: *huffs*
Z: "Hold on, I'm not finished. I love the way you look, smell, taste, and feel, and hell, I may just plain love you, period, but I'm so freaked at the moment...I can't be sure. This is all very *clears throat* new to me."
Emma: *studies Z's face and nods* "Ditto. Let's date, then."
Z (incredulously): "I just bared my soul to you, and all I get is ditto."
Emma: *laughs* "Aye."
Z: *stands*
Emma: "Z? What are you--"
Z: *hauls Emma out of her chair and kisses her*
Emma (dreamily): "Oh."
--Irritated Stares from Patrons--
Z: *whispers* "I don't think they're going to let us back in here after tonight."
Emma: "Donna care. I donna ken what Yuri and Kumi see in this place anyway; the service sucks."
