"When I first learned about BDSM I didn't want anything to do with it. Because BDSM is always presented as "dark" and sometimes abusive. But the reality is that BDSM can be so many different things."
I was/am the same. I think the first way in which I came across BDSM was it being explained as people 'wanting to hurt each other' and 'wanting to be hurt' and that... sort of didn't make sense to me in the way it was explained.
But now I can see how it's very broad and so many things, and is often just about people helping each other fulfil a need.
I have a few close friends who are very involved in various BDSM stuff, and I'm sort of... minorly involved in some BDSM community stuff. Tickling as a fetish is a bit of an outlier I think and I'm not SUPER interested in bondage outside of tickling.
And while I'm interested in spanking, it's the thing I'm least open about and/or talk about the least - especially because it's more TTWD than BDSM maybe in my interest and like, some of my BDSM friends have expressed sentiments like, "stay away from DD types. it's not proper consent and you don't want to get mixed up with them" etc so I've not really been open about how I feel about spanking/discipline.
I've gone to some munches and stuff (I'm guessing that's a term familiar to people here but in case not, it's basically a social meeting between people of the BDSM community but just... like a meeting in a pub or something and usually in your 'normal' clothes and just chatting and stuff, not play or anything). But I've always felt a bit like I don't really belong there, if that makes sense.
I actually have travelled to London to go to a specific tickle munch before which was a bit better.
But yeah, where you said here: "and it incorporates so many different kinks and fetishes, that if you're into the milder stuff, or if you have a very specific kink, it can feel like it doesn't fit."
I think that's why I sort of feel I don't 'belong' - and I'm also uninterested in sex as well.
You also may notice from my stories, I'm not really interested in what I'd consider maybe a 'bdsm setting'. I'm not totally sure what I mean by this but... yeah. I'm confused sometimes by what I'm into and trying to understand what I'm into.
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